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Clarissa ♥
18

Studying in Ngee Ann Poly
Int Supply Chain Mgt

Cougar Scout/Venture Group

Public Relations Assistant
34th Council
The Adventure Seekers

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Hello Everyone (: Enjoy reading about my life and Know me better (:
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    Date: Monday
    Time: 8:28 AM

    i feel so invaded
    why can't they just respect me for that
    it isn't easy for me already
    yet mocking me for what i did
    what i did is a mistake?
    i don't feel that way
    it's what i feel like doing at that point

    i happened to read something
    it's true
    i know i have thought about it that way
    but problem is the reality is always changing my thinking
    but what i can do i have already done my part
    i know and i don't believe in getting back what i have put in
    cos it's life

    sparing a thought for others before myself, is it a wise thing to do?
    i need an answer
    what matters the most
    you are happy will do



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    Date: Sunday
    Time: 12:21 PM
life

    being exposed to more
    meaning I will know more
    Yes, I did know more
    making me starting to wonder
    making me think twice already

    They ain't dogs after all
    What the shit is wrong with them
    freak it la dey
    Can't be bothered much already

    Freak my throat and nose now
    Problem shit
    Shitty life I have
    Wtf
    Fml



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    Date: Friday
    Time: 9:44 AM
life

    feel like stuffing my hand into my throat
    why?
    my throat hurts badly
    pain with dryness within, sucks

    someone told me yesterday : work is work
    cos i keep giving the sad face
    but someone was right
    work is work
    i should not mixed it up
    never mind, relac only
    thanks to that someone who reminded me (:

    worrying for MM pract now.
    hopefully i can get it done by today
    if not sun i sure knocked out once i reached home
    video i haven even watch halfway and the words is already 600plus
    how am i gonna summarize, rephrase as my points are in point form now
    halfway more to go for my video and don't know how more words to type in
    yet i need to summarize everything into 900 - 1000 words
    fml



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    Date: Wednesday
    Time: 12:50 AM
life

    i am really sleepy now
    just done with UR Assignment

    my brain ain't functioning properly
    throat hurts like wtf
    blocked nose which might affect me when i am sleeping later

    i didn't relac awhile just now
    sorry to myself
    but i am just confused with the number
    how many are there
    sigh



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    Date: Monday
    Time: 4:49 PM
realize

    Take time to realize,
    That your warmth is.
    Crashing down on in.
    Take time to realize,
    That I am on your side
    Didn't I, Didn't I tell you.
    But I can't spell it out for you,
    No it's never gonna be that simple
    No I cant spell it out for you
    If you just realize what I just realized,
    Then we'd be perfect for each other
    And will never find another
    Just realized what I just realized
    We'd never have to wonder if
    We missed out on each other now.
    Take time to realize
    Oh-oh I'm on your side
    Didn't I, didn't I tell you.
    Take time to realize
    This all can pass you by
    Didn't I tell you
    But I can't spell it out for you,
    No its never gonna be that simple
    No I can't spell it out for you.
    If you just realized what I just realized
    Then we'd be perfect for each other
    Then we'd never find another
    Just realized what I just realized
    We'd never have to wonder if
    We missed out on each other now.
    It's not always the same
    No it's never the same
    If you don't feel it to.
    If you meet me half way
    If you would meet me half way.
    It could be the same for you.
    If you just realized what I just realized
    Then we'd be perfect for each other
    Then we'd never find another
    Just realized what I just realized
    We'd never have to wonder
    Just realized what I just realized
    If you just realized what I just realized
    Missed out on each other now
    Missed out on each other now

    a meaningful song for a meaningful life
    reminded by friend about this song
    (:



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    Date:
    Time: 2:19 PM
life

    stay cool
    telling myself "relac ah"
    this is what P always tells me randomly
    so its like a reminder for me everytime
    i'll stay cool (:
    lac only
    let it be
    how many you there are
    there are 2 of ME and only i know which 2 (:

    mich just showed me about this kitty lab thingy
    guess i will be going down with my dearest jie jie men next wed (:
    PLEASE BE FREE!
    now only LIM is free, the other 2 ka jie dont know free not. ):
    i want go there! damn cool!
    i am so asking my parents to pay for me, what a bitch i am! HAHA!

    http://www.kittylab.com.sg/



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    Date:
    Time: 3:17 AM
two is better than one




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    Date: Saturday
    Time: 11:01 PM
life

    each day's happening will always end when the clock strikes 12
    each day's happening never seems to be brought over to the next
    each day's happening might turned out as a miracle
    each day's happening might turned out as a disaster
    treasure each day's happenings
    expect the unexpected for the next



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    Date:
    Time: 2:07 PM
life

    be who i am for who i am
    other will accept me for who i am
    and not for the me that isn't me

    yesterday couldn't be better off
    the day was hectic in certain ways
    but towards the end of the day
    everything turned fine
    partly was the talk with jason and yijie at KAP
    it did made me think and felt better
    thanks P and VP (:

    smile because i deserve smiling (:



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    Date:
    Time: 12:58 AM
life

    i have so much in mind to do now.
    1) learn drums, have this thought since year 1 but no time. but i am wondering if i can even have a drum set placed at home, oh man. no drum set play what drums sia, waste of my money.
    2) learn driving, waiting for miss michelle to turn 18
    3) buy alot of hands on stuffs to DIY things

    everything needs money!
    argh!
    i need money!
    i need a job!
    ):

    ROAR!



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    Date: Friday
    Time: 9:47 PM
life

    guts feeling
    Believe it or not
    losing hope
    enough of enthusiasm that was faked
    Time to be who I am
    All the shouting and screaming made my throat hurts once again
    I ain't happy
    I didn't wanted to show it out
    but my face seems to tell it all to others
    in the midst, it drizzle but it stopped
    Thankfully
    I want to make myself sober
    What a way to escape from reality
    What a Bitch



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    Date:
    Time: 9:38 AM
life

    deceiving myself
    being enthu
    acting though i am fine
    in class now
    seems like i am in my own world
    i want to talk to someone
    i feel like skipping class today
    i feel like going CH's council corner, sit there and cry
    the tears is already lingering yet i cant let it out
    what has become of me
    i need to talk to someone
    i cant wait for tonight so let my feelings out

    when will i be independent enough
    without the worrying i have for others
    can i just be heartless enough
    can i just let the others be
    shit, my tears are coming out already
    what a bitch i am
    why am i such an emo bitch

    it's been long since i felt so depressed.
    i am sorry, sorry for being myself
    why am i feel bad for being who i am
    maybe i just didn't want this to happen



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    Date: Thursday
    Time: 10:27 AM
life




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    Date:
    Time: 12:29 AM
life

    will everything prove how strong this can be
    will time prove me wrong or prove me right
    up to this point of time, i have no answer still
    after so much things that happened
    so much things that is being gone through
    i came to realised i might be regretting for my decision for it that i made on 18th Oct
    i am sorry, to those who understand
    really sorry
    i don't know why am i feeling this way
    spending time alone will make me think
    that's why


    today i am just being reminded of 1 thing
    loving someone means not holding back that someone
    loving someone doesn't mean you have to have that someone
    loving someone is to see that someone being happy
    loving someone is to see that someone soaring high even without you
    does all this defines love?

    ok, i am not emo-ing or something.
    this is what i am taught for my Understanding Relationship class.
    Pls don't be mistaken alright.
    though all those words did make me think about my present life
    but ultimately love is not the right word for me to use
    UR class really made me think of what's going on in my life now
    i realised alot of things, can be good or bad



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    Date: Wednesday
    Time: 9:48 PM
life

    SC,
    can you tell me what to do
    why is it me always the one
    i sense the differences
    or is it me that is thinking too much
    i hope i am but fact is failing on me
    i have no idea who to go too regarding this
    this is driving me crazy
    what am i suppose to tell myself
    thought through pros and cons
    all this is really suicidal kind
    i need the strength
    voice from within is getting weaker
    i hate myself being like that
    i wish there is always someone permanent for me to go to
    but friends are always busy with their issues too
    and not all i can go too
    at times my day was awesome making me feel blessed
    at times fact will just slapped me in the face
    fact is so real that i cant avoid
    but of course, the words will always cover the negative thoughts i have in me
    me and my thinking
    i am sorry, SC.
    hope you don't see this ):



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    Date: Tuesday
    Time: 3:23 PM
life

    jiaying just reminded me of x-mas (:
    will Santa give me that present i have in mind as my x-mas present ):
    i hope this year's x-mas will be better
    Santa, please
    ):
    oh man
    i ain't asking for alot right
    ):
    amour
    random note : i just ask jia jia to go see that album. hahaha! she so KPO uh (: hahaha



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    Date:
    Time: 12:08 PM
life

    these few days i have been thinking a lot
    with so much in my mind
    i came to realise
    within me there is a conclusion i suppose
    after all the words said and replies
    after so much of thinking
    i am afraid
    afraid that councilship will end
    i never expected me to tear once i have the thought that councilship is ending soon
    and i teared yesterday
    i think i will miss them to the max because laughters will never failed on me when i am with them
    the crappyness, nonsense of them always make my day
    not to forget what is going on in me
    i realised it's not gone
    it stayed on
    but i am suppressed it to a corner already
    keeping the words, feelings within is best for both worlds


    my throat is hurting badly
    damn it bitch
    how to cure it siol, neh neh



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